“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles…The point is, we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress.”
~The Big Book
I Am What I Am… and More
It doesn’t really bother me to say I’m an alcoholic. Not that I nonchalantly or indiscriminately blab it out, but when appropriate, I own up to it.
But that’s because I now know that it’s a mere fraction of who I am. That is not my only adjective. In fact, I am a creative, strong, humorous, prolific, wise, open-minded, friendly, caring person in the process of discovery, recovery, and ongoing un-covery. I used to not be able to say any of that.
I feel empowered when I own the alcoholic part of myself because it means I’m addressing it, being authentic, and learning how to live a great life in spite of it––perhaps even because of it. When I was actively drinking, I was in denial, shame, and silence.
I no longer feel it’s a stigma. Do you? Someone (a normie wouldn’t you know) once told me oh, yes, it’s still a terrible stigma. Well, maybe in the eye of the beholder––but not in my world.
It is increasingly evident to me that people who are actively working a recovery program, seeking to align with the higher nature of things––with the higher nature of themselves––are among the most interesting, impressive, and triumphant people on the planet. Every time I attend a meeting, I am in some way amazed, awakened, and inspired.
Even in meetings that do not resonate with me, inevitably something or someone will give me a lift. So I am learning to simply expect that lift, and let the rest go. No drama or judgement on the less-inspiring ones.
And I am realizing that the lift, and the inner peace and tranquility, can be found in countless other places outside the rooms, particularly in nature. Or through another person’s presence or words. Or deep within myself. Yeah, even though I’m an alcoholic.
As long as I keep seeking, I keep finding what works for me. And I keep coming back.
Are you able to acknowledge your alcoholism/addiction as a part of a wonderful whole?
Are you able to find serenity in the rooms and outside the rooms?
In gratitude, harmony, and support,