Today’s article is an excerpt from the book, Holy Desperation: Praying as If Your Life Depends on It, by Heather King. This concise yet beautiful piece explores the question, “Where is God.” You may read the original post at IgnatianSpirituality.com.

In gratitude, harmony, and support,

 

 

What I Did Each Morning

 

by Heather King

 

We’ve been given this insane gift of life. We’re living in the midst of the Resurrection. And all day, all night, still our hearts ask, Where is God?

Early in my sobriety I began to realize that God was the things, or in or behind the things, or had created the things, that I’d loved my whole life. Bach cantatas, all flowers, all birds. The man or woman who suffered and who didn’t complain and who tried to help the next person.

Oh—that’s God. The blue heron. The trees that changed color in fall. That swelling in my heart when the tattooed guy with three months of sobriety choked up as he said, “My wife cut me out of her life, but she’s gonna let me see my two-year-old daughter. I’m gonna see my little girl next week.”

I’ve also met people who were never going to cross the threshold of any church and who had a deep God-consciousness. “God is polite!” they’d say wonderingly. Or longingly, “I want a God with a face!” or “You know what I realized yesterday? God isn’t mad at me! I always thought God was mad at me.”

We’re all onto something. As Meister Eckhart observed, God is like a suitor. He never forces himself on us, but if we have eyes to see, he’s everywhere. “Hey, over here, check it out: a ruby-throated hummingbird!” “Hello there, you with the heavy heart, look, a sunrise!” “Yoo-hoo, I know you think no one loves you, but look, this beggar man is dying to touch your hand!”

Things changed for me when I began to see that I had always loved God and that what I did each morning—that sitting quietly watching the light, listening to the sparrows, feeling incoherently grateful, letting my mind wander to the mysteries of the universe—was prayer.

 

—Excerpted from Holy Desperation by Heather King

 

 

Holy Desperation

4 thoughts on “Holy Desperation

  • October 5, 2017 at 3:43 pm
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    That is beautiful. I have always believed in God. Although I never really noticed the beauty of the world I guess I took it for granted. Being sober has changed all that for me. I am so grateful for all the beauty but most of all I am grateful because God saved my life. God is Great

    Reply
    • October 12, 2017 at 6:42 pm
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      Hi Karen, I love how you articulated that the beauty of the world was taken for granted. I relate to that – I was too focused on myself and my needs I barely saw things in the day to day moments… I could appreciate beauty if it was a designated opportunity like going to a park or to Yosemite or to the mountains… but today I see the abundant beauty in each individual leaf, each cloud, each everything. I know now that was always there – grateful that I now see it and cannot NOT see it… God is Great!

      Reply
  • October 12, 2017 at 9:04 am
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    The Big Book says, paraphrased, that we have two choices. Continue to self destruct and have a fatalistic life leading to an agonizing death………OR…….find a Spiritual Solution.

    Emphasis for me is Solution. My New Thought way of thinking is a solution for me that brings me home.

    Reply
    • October 12, 2017 at 6:50 pm
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      Denise – for me too the solution lies in my seeking of the solution. I like the Meister Ekhart quote that says – paraphrased – If we have eyes to seek and see the Infinite, it’s everywhere.

      Reply

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