“The world will persist in exhibiting before you what you persist in affirming what the world is.”

~Emma Curtis Hopkins


“Easy does it.”

~AA Credo



Easy to be Hard



Easy to be hard – dating myself but a long-forgotten tune pops in my mind as I type those words – maybe from the early 70’s when I was starting to get stoned so it’s a little hazy but funny how lyrics lurk and flood back on cue. Three Dog Night? (Wow yes AND from the “HAIR” soundtrack too! I do remember…Thank you Internet. Something my 70’s self did not have access to for instant research, lest I take things for granted!)


Recent conversations inform me that I tend to default to easily noticing when things feel hard, uncomfortable, are not working out, or not working out quickly enough. It’s easy to feel that it’s hard.


But when things are easy, gliding along effortlessly I’m often not consciously aware of it – I can almost discount it as “oh yeah, but it’s actually hard…” then seek out, emotionalize, and pick up what’s “hard.”


What if I could catch those moments when things effortlessly glide along, and shine a mental spotlight on them in that moment? Reverse the default to be feeding my awareness that things are easy and getting easier. When it feels hard, then think “oh yeah, that’s nothing, it’s actually easy…”


The above quote from Emma Curtis Hopkins says that if I keep affirming in my mind how hard things are, then things will continue to be so. This is the law of attraction – what I focus on, I attract in – or at least my awareness is tuned to that… so that will be my experience.
On the other hand, easy things are happening all the time now – like waking up with a clear mind and easily getting out of bed without a pounding hangover headache, or having to start the day puking.


Interesting to me how it’s easy to gloss over that, and default to lamenting on the things that are hard.


Even a subtle word shift makes a difference. I’m learning to practice replacing “this is hard” with “this feels challenging today.” Or to acknowledge “part of me is having a hard time with this, but a larger part of me is handling things with ease and grace.”


When I first got sober, it was definitely harder than now. Even harder still were those months leading up to my sobriety date – when I knew loud and clear that I had a problem and was going to have to quit drinking and drugging “one of these days.” I had that continual stressful anxiety permeating through me as I focused on where my next drink was coming from and the one after that.


I love this analogy: If I found a huge heavy steel ball blocking my path that I had to move because I couldn’t get around it, it would be hard at first. I’d have to lean into it and push with all my might to try to get it to budge. But once I got it rolling with some momentum behind it, I could keep it going with much less effort. Over time, I could just tap it and it would continue in motion…


That’s how I see my recovery. It’s rolling along as long as I keep leaning into it.


Easy does it.



What is something that you’re conditioned to thinking is hard but may be getting easier?

Can you re-word or re-frame something that is a limiting belief in a way that shifts the tone and the energy to an easier feeling?

Name 3 things that are easier for you today as a sober clear-headed person than they were before in the haze.


In gratitude, harmony, and support,


Easy to be Hard

2 thoughts on “Easy to be Hard

  • December 12, 2017 at 4:11 pm

    Hard was my life before sobriety. Drinking became a full time job. Coming up with the money to buy alcohol, how to drink it before, during and after work, how to cover my bills, hidding from people and so on.
    Today I consider my life boring. Actually if I think about it is not fun of exciting. I feel like I am going through life like a robot. I go to the gym, out once in awhile, but yet I still feel alone. So I can relate.

    • December 16, 2017 at 11:34 am

      For me too managing drinking was becoming a full time job and a stressful one at that. Making sure I had it, hiding it, remembering where I hid it, trying to remember if I had stuff stashed around that would be discovered… I have to say that I do not feel life is boring now – I feel like a sponge in that I want to do too much – want to experience all the things I missed out on, making up for lost time. I feel too frantic sometimes, too scattered, too over-committed more so than bored…


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