Our guest post today is curated from The SHAIR Podcast. In this episode, country singer Brinn Black shares about her life as an adult child of an alcoholic. We think our readers will appreciate Brinn’s sweetness and candor. When asked, “What is the best suggestion you have ever received?” she replies, “To let myself be loved.” And to the question, “If you could give our listeners only one suggestion, what would it be?” her answer is, “Just to give themselves some grace.”
Recent posts by some of our wonderful guest bloggers shared several ways they stayed sober while navigating through real life events, while having fun during non-routine experiences. And isn’t that why we are getting and staying sober? To experience a fun, healthy, joyous life not only in – but also outside of –“the rooms.”
Back in the day, you loved to party. Whether you got drunk or high, it was how you had fun. Well, not really. It took you a while to realize it, but substance abuse was an attempt to run away from problems, and it wasn’t very successful. Eventually, you realized you wanted (and needed) to stay sober. After some hard work, you managed it. You began your new life in addiction recovery, and you’re rightfully proud of what you’ve accomplished. But then you hear about the party. It sounds fun and repulsive at the same time. Can you have a social life while in addiction recovery?
As I peer into the warm and vibrantly beautiful month of June… I sense new ideas, new opportunities, and new situations already planted in me coming into a thriving existence. I trust the process as I give life to that which comes to be by means of me… I am grateful to know that as the days grow longer, there is always enough time for everything that seeks expression by means of me… I open my arms wide to welcome the divinely timed arrival of June, which is already filled with love, light, and limitless possibility. I am strong, I am open, and I receive all the gifts life has to offer including health, joy, abundance, and love.
A sober summer can be stress-free and enjoyable… if you manage it right. I got sober in May in the gorgeous beach town of Encinitas, California. It was glorious, summer-like weather year-round and surfers, yoginis and healthy vegans populated the landscape. Enjoying my first sober summer was pretty stress-free—in most regards. Besides the crying, agitation, anxiety, not sleeping or oversleeping, I was able to be sober and hang out with my sober pals, and it sure did make that first sober summer enjoyable.
I was getting a massage at the chiropractor’s office this morning (gratitude) and the masseuse, who just hit 10 years of sobriety (a mutual topic previously discovered) told me that on the way to work this morning she stopped at the store and purchased (not one, but) 10 boxes of Mike and Ike candy. She was going to give it to her roommate to help her manage them as she knew that she could sit and eat 5 of them in one sitting… like the 4 ice creams she ate the other day. A Sister! Out of nowhere this can happen, though it may be months or years in between such sugar loads for either of us.
My son is a recovering heroin addict and his addiction lasted fourteen years. At the end of his using, he was shooting heroin into his neck, having destroyed his veins in his arms, legs and feet. Today, he is ten years sober. That doesn’t mean his addiction is over, but it does mean that Jeff made the decision to change his life.
I hated those cruel commercials early on in my recovery – the ones where stunningly beautiful friends partied merrily, laughed cheerfully, looking chic, holding colorful cocktails or frosted mugs (I would have been holding one of each, by the way.) I wanted that but couldn’t have it. But a wise sponsor told me, “Oh yeah? Well mentally put yourself in that scene. Now fast forward 5 hours of so. See yourself now? Is that you with your mascara smeared under your eyes? What’s that you spilled on your shirt? Is that your voice blabbing too loudly and slurring your words? Keep going… where are you waking up? With who? Eww. There may be puking.